Timeline - By Greatgoalie17

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ehzgsKRfSgY


Comment Or Die

SQREMBED:

TIMELINE REVIEW IN TIMELINE FORM.

Pre-Video thoughts: RD is hella cruel. lol. :jumpgun:

Intro thoughts: wat... Needs less Windows Movie Maker

Beginning: Great Scenery, no problems, all good, all hap--WARP :bigtank:
You could've used some obvious editing or portals or something instead of going white text over black background WARP in the middle of a video. But I guess it worked.

Scenery in general: Awesome stuff. Some stuff was a little "unrefined," you know? The omniscient curves in the ocean, some cliffs in the 1800's. P.S. No space needle in 1800s
:plane:



Timeline: You need cleaner numbers. Rushed this? ._. :cry1: :|

Ending: Good scenery, yet again.

Trackwise I didn't see a problem
Splitting needed work, there were clear mistakes. ;_;

Overall: :smart: , / 10

Copied from .org, IRTL has nub smilies

what ktk said... great scenery but alot of blank parts compared to the rest.... nice idea tho

I like how you did the clouds in the last stage.

I definitely sense that unrefinedness that ktk is talking about. Some parts look unfinished or you were rushing.

Ofc it was good, but always can improve. The tracks went to the right a lot too.

Wow, did you purposely make it better as it went along?
Because that's what it seemed like to me.
Amazing job, but there were some spots that were iffy.
But yeah, I love the theme. +rep

I feel like giving a rabidreview It'll be pros & cons

Usually I try to focus on the track and not on the editing or splitting, but in this vid it was really part of the experience so I'll start with that:

Editing/Miscellaneous stuff:
+ Awesome concept. This was definitely something unique. (You seem to like making many small tracks, don't you? )
+ I liked how the music changed to fit the different areas, it was cool
- Introduction (w/construction) - the "GG presents" was fine, but what was the point of this? A very small track that wasn't all that great... just start at the beginning of the timeline...
- The time line itself was kind of sloppy. Looked like a timeline I made in 6th grade for a life science project
- Warps weren't consistent - I would have liked one standard warp sound and for the same thing to happen each time (even if it was a WMM "WARP" title) I dunno, maybe it's just me (and what the heck is that green square?)
- 1826 recording was whack, and the splits were kinda iffy (thought I only noticed the last one until I watched it again). I wouldn't have minded a delay in the release for this, it's a very important part of the experience.
- Often times it felt like I couldn't see everything in the picture, like stuff was being cut off all over the place. Maybe zooming in and out (Manual Mayhem X-treme style) could make it much cooler.
- I don't think there were skyscrapers in 1826... or in any case, very few.
/ Strange ending. Not that I don't like the aliens, but I think some ubermega extreme explosion would be much cooler (owait, you did have one... maybe zooming out would be good, because I totally did not realize that was a mushroom cloud until like the 3rd watch lol)

Okay, that was mostly negative. Sorry Maybe you should consider a re-release, with a better recording with zooming to see everyting, better splits, better warps, better editing, a better timeline, and no weird intro. That would get rid of most of the negative points above Usually I don't like re-releases, but in this case I think it'd be a very good idea.

NOW for the real stuff. The actual track and scenery.

Track:
Before the pros and cons, I should say a little bit about the purpose of the track. This video was really not about the track, it was about the story, and then the scenery, and the track was supposed to be sort of a way of showcasing everything.
+ The track definitely kept things moving. In tracks like these, I hate it when the guy stays in one spot for very long, especially when you can't tell what he's doing (*coughmetamorphiccough*)
- The lines were too long, making them very difficult to scene. It looked like you made a decent track, and then tried to put scenery on it. When you make tracks like this, make lots of gaps and avoid long lines. This was okay in the beginning, (there were a few moments it bothered me but nothing bad) but in the last one it was particularly noticeable and distracting. 2:26, 2:30, 2:33, and 2:38 just look bad, even with awesome drawings of things on top of them - they just don't work in the environment, and it was very distracting.
- Tricks. Well, it wasn't a bad track, but you seemed to be trying to do tricks like large tail manuals and granuals and stuff like that. I personally found it distracting - I thought if it were more basic tricks (maybe executed a little better) it wouldn't distract from the scenery as much.
- While it did keep moving, I felt like the scenery went really fast in the wrong spots. This was fine in the first two, but in the second two it got a little annoying... he stayed on the cactus for quite a while, and then zoomed past the city at hyperspeed so I had to pause it to see it, (and zoomed through the rest of that track too, until the trees, which aren't really very important) and then it stayed on the top of and then zoomed past the mushroom cloud in the last one (so it was really hard to tell what it was)

Wow, that was mostly negative too. sorry I know this one will have plenty of positives though, because we have arrived at the scenery

Scenery:

10 billion BC or whatever ()
+ That palm tree looks SO real
+ Awesome rocks there too
+ Tyrannosaurus was iffy, but Apatosaurus was awesome (but I couldn't see his head darnit, zoom out! )
/ You kinda copied TD with that tree bit
/ Awesome ocean floor stuff, but they didn't all feel cohesive. You don't need to put something new every 3 inches. Also, the water line was kinda rushed/basic, and I thought there should have been more things actually floating IN the water. Still, the snake was great (I instantly knew it was a water snake) and some of the drawings were really good too.

953 AD
+ Insane castle (even though that line across the first tower kinda distracted me)
- 1:16 to 1:19 was bare and unfinished, and 1:22 to 1:25 looked very strange (like I had no idea what tit was supposed to be)
+ Those tents look awesome, and very real.
/ I want to see more of that mansion at 1:28 (zoom ). It's awesome, but maybe a little small (not as foreboding)

1826
+ That city is pure insanity (but it flies by so fast and you can't see all of it - ZOOM OUT!!! )
/ The caravan is cool, but looks kind of... unfinished...
/ The rest is kind of cool, but really strange-looking. If they're supposed to be hills those look really geometrical. It just all felt a bit sloppy through here, including the strange shading of the top part of the trees.
/ I thought the sign was weird, sloppy, unneeded, and really distracting (the warp looked really weird and different this time too)

2050
+ WOW, that SMOKE! It looks so awesome!!!! The flames aren't bad either
+ Firetruck, car crash & ambulance = win. (except for the track lines that have nothing to do with them)
- Text and people - you probably shouldn't put text in unless it's really crucial and easy to spot (I learned this the hard way lol) and if you do make sure it's VERY readable. The line art shop and the other store were REALLY hard to read as they flew by, and they distracted/detracted. Same goes for people - only if they're really necessary and/or if you REALLY know how to draw them. People and text always command the center of your attention, and if they're sloppy it just looks bad.
+ That plane looks awesome too (if it weren't for the track line slicing it in half )
/ I couldn't really make sense of the scenery from about 2:38 to 2:42.
+ Nice building at 2:43 and nice explosion (though you don't zoom out and it flies by so it's hard to see)
/ At about 2:42, you start losing track of perspective - I couldn't tell where everything as and how big everything was...
+ Nice aliens. I still think I giant explosion would be cooler, almost like a HUGE comic book "POW" thing

WRAP-UP/CONCLUSION
This was very good. The idea is awesome, and most of the drawings are way better than anything I could ever draw I never once got bored. It didn't really wow me because of the incompleteness and the sloppiness in some places (and the iffy editing/recording), but it was very cool when I stopped and looked at all the stuff that was in it that I missed the first time. You're probably the first person to draw a city that well, and to draw explosions that well, so I congratulate you

I really think you should consider a re-release. Patch up the splits as best you can, make the recordings better and zoom at the appropriate places, make a better timeline, maybe finish that one bit in 953, take out the odd intro thing, and make the warps consistent. I think that would make this track much better

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WOW that was long! I hope you got something out of it

And why did you disable ratings?

EDIT: oh, and can I embed it? lolz (I think I will)

This^

U have some very awesome stuff there!

Well, for being the big epic more than a year project, it could have been better. I didn't expect a bunch of min itracks put together with some lulzy editing, when the big green square ate Bosh I laughed. The mini tracks were slightly below average track making I usually see, but the scenery made up for it, definately something with the scenery. Some of the editing could have taken an extra 10 minutes and gotten cleaned up a bit, some jumpy splitting could have been clean.

Overall, it was fun to watch, and I enjoyed every bit of it. Definately worth something, so good job GG17.

first of all
when BHCS re edits and re releases this
you will see that TImeline is actually a giant track with with certain parts changed for each scene in time...and it will be way better
This basic vid will only be out for 2 weeks then i am taking it down so BHCS can re edit it for me because i dont have the time or tools to do a real well done editing Job
also
wow thank you Rabid for the incredibly in depth review

I really love huge tracks in little chunks, I know how boring it is to scene one whole track with the same scenery. Overall I think this is an amazing track! I'll just review each part:
The long time ago bit:
The palm tree was amazing, the dinosaurs were good too
The underwater part was ok, I didn't like the background part, bit too simple. However the coral reef thing was great!
Medieval:
That was great! The castles were really good! The only problem with this part was the part with the tents, bit too empty.
City part:
The rocks at the start were soooo amazing! And the bit with the caravan was ok, however the trees trunks were great! But the cross-hatching on the trees sorta brought it down....
Futuristic-end of the world:
Well the smoke was truly amazing with the speed it was shown at, but some slower parts of the smoke made it look a bit random, and there was a blank part were there should be smoke...The cars and ambulence were good on their own, but it was a little blank around them.

You can see I just analysed the scenery....as that's the only thing I know

Overall I think the whole thing was amazing! You clearly have worked really hard on this! So well done! This is truly epic! GG, that was amazing!

Very good. I like it.

I thought i was great
Good sceneing except for the timeline, sloppy
Otherwise Great job

Woah.

'Nuff said.

so damn epic! I am surprised you finished

some parts looked rushed, but most parts had unbelievable scenery.

faved*

I'll give you a big review at next thursday, I'll be gone all this week too. >_<

EDIT: I'm in credits!

If I'm completely honest it wasn't as good as I thought it would be. There were some epic moments but mainly it was average scenery and the track was very slow.

I have to agree with Perry, there are some parts where the scenery was good, but mostly there were quirky and basic scenery, there could be different shading on alot of places, the whole track was a bit to big too.
And the first part isn't that much needed. Some empty spaces, but overall a quite fun track to watch.

Nooo you removed the video

Nooo you removed the video

Its because he's redoing the editing
Its because he's redoing the editing

Traxis wrote:Its because he's redoing the editing
Its because he's redoing the editing

yay:D thats great, i feel stupid

Traxis wrote:Its because he's redoing the editing
Its because he's redoing the editing

What was wrong with the editing? Also this way he won't get as many views I don't think