The Lost Valley ~ LineBenji

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The Lost Valley ~ LineBenji

Post by LineBenji on Thu Aug 21, 2014 5:12 pm

Hello guys !



I know you're waiting for it and i'm proud to present you my track.
One year passed since the beginning of this track and I hope the result is correct.

There are mistakes in the scenery and some irrational things but I tried to draw huge monuments and creatures. My real drawing skill (on paper I mean) help me a lot since Colossus and I think my future scened track will be better and better.

For the rocks and the cliffs of the track, i choose a really simple style in order to save lines. This style give a lacunar aspect to the track but it's very important I think.

The edit with WMM was ****** ! I'm sorry for that.

And the future now ? I want to be ambitious and try to scened a track is the style of Transcendental with huge landscapes and building. A 60-90 seconds track should be good for that. So if someone want me to scened one of his track, don't hesitate to send me the .sol . I want a old school track full of manual and old school flying Wink .

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Re: The Lost Valley ~ LineBenji

Post by Getthim on Thu Aug 21, 2014 5:32 pm

Very nice scenery, simple is usually best unless you are going really slow/monument

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Re: The Lost Valley ~ LineBenji

Post by Fauxfyre on Thu Aug 21, 2014 7:49 pm

Your true talent is drawing creatures, and these monsters are awesome! When you attempt your next ambitious track, keep that in mind because I always enjoy seeing your creature/animal drawings the most and find that the highlight of your style.  Smile 

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Re: The Lost Valley ~ LineBenji

Post by efrazable on Thu Aug 21, 2014 8:38 pm

the nostalgia was just awesome, I loved all of it. Also, it's amazing how you can draw so many things with textures to the point of realism.

the dragon reminds me of the dragon on our marching band website



dovahkiin, dovahkiin, not a single sardine

EDIT: OMG THAT'S MY TRACK Very Happy Very Happy

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Re: The Lost Valley ~ LineBenji

Post by Opal Rider on Thu Aug 21, 2014 8:55 pm

I loved it. Really the only thing that felt out of place to me was the dinosaur. The amount of detail put into it was amazing on its own, but it contrasted with the surrounding area, and sort of stood out in an awkward way because of it. But besides that, the track was great. Keep it up!

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Re: The Lost Valley ~ LineBenji

Post by gaoyubao on Fri Aug 22, 2014 7:38 am

C'est très bien fait. Tous les animaux sont très bien déssinés. J'ai aussi bien aimé tous les détails, comme les petits bonhommes. Celui à côté du bâteau me fait rappeler le bonhomme à la fin de "Hooked" par aspi33. Les roches manquent un peu de détail, comme tu l'as dit, mais ce n'est pas grave car le reste du scenery compense pour le talent.

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Re: The Lost Valley ~ LineBenji

Post by Pawel3 on Fri Aug 22, 2014 8:05 am


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Re: The Lost Valley ~ LineBenji

Post by rabid squirrel on Fri Aug 22, 2014 1:40 pm

Hah, didn't know it was efraz's track! might be nice to thank him specifically for making it.

The recording looks pinkish in your editing, I think it might be because it was .mov - next time ask for .wmv

Okay rabid review time! Let's get out my scenery rubric and stuff. (Keep in mind that the best tracks are ones that defy the rules!)

Ambitious? not really but that's okay.
Epic factor/Impressive? not terribly impressive (pretty short) but again that's okay
Complete/Cohesive? yes, felt complete
Vision? somewhat. you had a nice idea of where to put monuments and a nice ending.
An Experience? hmm. yeah, it was. somewhat.

Quality of art? Great! the best part was definitely the creatures (eagle, dragon, dinosaur), but the ship and the lighthouse were great too!
Creativity in scening things? good! loved how you hid the fling with the birds and the other one with the eagle with the branch!, and the pinch was great (pinches are hard). I also liked how you added the "fake track" smooth curves in places bosh didn't go. it worked nicely.
Speed manipulations? never got fast enough. not an issue.
Detail? monuments were nice and detailed. ground was pretty plain but I think "adding detail" could easily have made it look worse.
Consistency? overall it was pretty consistent. water and rocks.
Unified Theme? The rocks/water theme was good and carried through the whole thing. But the monuments were (though really cool) somewhat random. a dinosaur, an eagle, a dragon, a ship, and a lighthouse - sounds kinda like "let's just draw cool stuff!"
Originality? You could work on being more original. This project was executed well but the rocky cliff thing has been done soooooo many times. Think outside the box!
Speed? Felt a little slow but that was mostly the recording was zoomed out. But I think you should think a little more about what you want the recording to look like (e.g. the ship was way above him so I had to zoom way out to see it) Just a thought for future projects. I go a little crazy with planning and framing the recording personally, lol. Now that you see how good I can split,

Monument placement? Except for the ship which was too far away, really good! the dino, the dragon, the eagle, the lighthouse - nice job.
Monument usage? eagle was good. lighthouse was good. dragon and dino were off to the side but that was fine.
3-D (extrusion, adding shine, shading, contour lines, adding depth)? I liked the depth created with the water and rocks. otherwise not a ton of this.
Made sense? Yes! good!
"Hiding" the track? none that I didn't like! already talked about how I liked the flings.
Good Ending? yeah! well, maybe could have had something in the sky rather than just the lighthouse. but overall good.

tell me if you are having difficulty understanding anything I said!

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Re: The Lost Valley ~ LineBenji

Post by LineBenji on Thu Aug 28, 2014 5:13 am

Hi everybody, i'm so sorry but last week I moved house and I lose my internet connection. Currently, i'm using the wifi of my school campus.

Your true talent is drawing creatures, and these monsters are awesome! When you attempt your next ambitious track, keep that in mind because I always enjoy seeing your creature/animal drawings the most and find that the highlight of your style. Smile


Thank you, monsters and creatures aren't the things I prefer to draw. IRL, I only draw portrait (I drew a small one at the end of Colossus) and animals (I can draw them without model). I think that a track can't be great without at least one great drawing. I mean that you need to draw a large and detailled creature or monument to keep people's attention.

the nostalgia was just awesome, I loved all of it. Also, it's amazing how you can draw so many things with textures to the point of realism.

the dragon reminds me of the dragon on our marching band website

The dragon you found was the one I use as model to draw. I added to it more scale and I changed his eyes.

C'est très bien fait. Tous les animaux sont très bien déssinés. J'ai aussi bien aimé tous les détails, comme les petits bonhommes. Celui à côté du bâteau me fait rappeler le bonhomme à la fin de "Hooked" par aspi33. Les roches manquent un peu de détail, comme tu l'as dit, mais ce n'est pas grave car le reste du scenery compense pour le talent.

Merci beaucoup de ton commentaire, j'apprécie l'effort que tu fais de parler en français. Même si mon anglais est correcte, il reste tout du moins mauvais.
J'ai longtemps hésité à laisser les petits bonhommes qui apparaissent dans la piste. Je ne savais pas exactement s'ils allaient correspondre avec l'ambiance générale de la piste. Au final, il ajoute une petite touche d'humour et son des dédicaces à quelques uns de mes amis.
J'essayerai de faire des roches plus détaillées le prochain coup.

Hah, didn't know it was efraz's track! might be nice to thank him specifically for making it.
I'm sorry but I simply forgot the original owner or the bare track when I made the edit.

Ambitious? not really but that's okay.
Epic factor/Impressive? not terribly impressive (pretty short) but again that's okay
Complete/Cohesive? yes, felt complete
Vision? somewhat. you had a nice idea of where to put monuments and a nice ending.
An Experience? hmm. yeah, it was. somewhat.

Quality of art? Great! the best part was definitely the creatures (eagle, dragon, dinosaur), but the ship and the lighthouse were great too!
Creativity in scening things? good! loved how you hid the fling with the birds and the other one with the eagle with the branch!, and the pinch was great (pinches are hard). I also liked how you added the "fake track" smooth curves in places bosh didn't go. it worked nicely.
Speed manipulations? never got fast enough. not an issue.
Detail? monuments were nice and detailed. ground was pretty plain but I think "adding detail" could easily have made it look worse.
Consistency? overall it was pretty consistent. water and rocks.
Unified Theme? The rocks/water theme was good and carried through the whole thing. But the monuments were (though really cool) somewhat random. a dinosaur, an eagle, a dragon, a ship, and a lighthouse - sounds kinda like "let's just draw cool stuff!"
Originality? You could work on being more original. This project was executed well but the rocky cliff thing has been done soooooo many times. Think outside the box!
Speed? Felt a little slow but that was mostly the recording was zoomed out. But I think you should think a little more about what you want the recording to look like (e.g. the ship was way above him so I had to zoom way out to see it) Just a thought for future projects. I go a little crazy with planning and framing the recording personally, lol. Now that you see how good I can split,

Monument placement? Except for the ship which was too far away, really good! the dino, the dragon, the eagle, the lighthouse - nice job.
Monument usage? eagle was good. lighthouse was good. dragon and dino were off to the side but that was fine.
3-D (extrusion, adding shine, shading, contour lines, adding depth)? I liked the depth created with the water and rocks. otherwise not a ton of this.
Made sense? Yes! good!
"Hiding" the track? none that I didn't like! already talked about how I liked the flings.
Good Ending? yeah! well, maybe could have had something in the sky rather than just the lighthouse. but overall good.

tell me if you are having difficulty understanding anything I said!

Whaou ! Thanks for the review, it was really appreciate.
This track is not an impressive track. I scened it because I love this game and I want to make the community live. The track's lenght was to short to pretend to make an impressive track.
For the quality of art, I only tried to draw in a very clean way. And I probably made mistake when I drew the dinosaur which is very dark compared to the whole track.

I easily understand english when people write or speak to me but I have more difficulties when I try to answer Wink. IDK if you make oral skype conversation sometimes but if you wanna heard my beautiful accent, add me :P.


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